Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
