no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
