i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize