Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
