Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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