When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize