last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
