I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
