My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
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