Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
