HIV tests are more positive than that guy
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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