Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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