we're blogging at a bar
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
