Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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