Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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