i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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