Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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