you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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