He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
