scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
