We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Everclear isn't food dammit
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize