I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
