Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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