Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize