we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
