Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.