she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize