the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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