as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
