If that was your dad, he is hot
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
