There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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