Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
