I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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