Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!

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(305): View more from Florida

If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining

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(707): View more from California

I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.

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(260): View more from Indiana

I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.

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25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(516): View more from New York

I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.

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(207): View more from Maine

Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow

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(919): View more from North Carolina

You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?

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