Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
