what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
