im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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