i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Dick very happy bro
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
