worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
