her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
