he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
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i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
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Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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