Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
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Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
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THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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