spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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