Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
operation have a gay friend backfired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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