i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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