i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Randomize
