S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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