I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
