I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize