you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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