he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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