i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
only if we run a train.
done.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
